Husband

Dear Shreve,
    Although we have only known each other for less than a year, the times we have shared have meant so much to me. All my life I have been striving to become the ideal "Southern gentleman  that my father never was. It is simple enough to say that has been my only motive in trying so hard at manly perfection, but there is another reason; a more secret reason. All my life I have been over powered by people. My sister with her noble airs always telling me what to do even as we grew older. Her suitors always getting the best of me and making me look like a fool in what was supposed to be a noble act of chivalry towards one's sister. And then even my retarded younger brother has bested me. If my assumptions are true then he committed a vile act to which I tried to convince everyone I did in order to show some form of manliness, but no one would believe that I would be "man enough" to do it.
    Coming to Harvard and meeting you brought me great joy, for here was someone who wouldn't judge on pass deeds. Here was someone who I could start fresh with. At school I could focus on the outwardly appearance of what made a man a gentleman. While it was different than what I had been shown as the picture of what made a man a man, it was a start. For a while I thought my new life was working, but alas, time caught up with me. For a while now I have been trying to trick my shadow, but I'm too exhausted. I can't keep running from my past just as I can't keep running from the truth. The truth is that all this time I've been deluding myself. I've been trying to become something I'm not. I'm not a conventional image of a man; in fact I'm the exact opposite. The point of this letter is to convey what I have been trying desperately to overcome and that is my feelings for you. I love you. Ever since I first met you I have admired your cavalier attitude towards societal conventions.
   I will always love you; I'm sorry I was not strong enough to overcome my past and familiar expectations in order for us to be together. I have failed you just like I have failed everybody else, which is why I see no other option. My shadow has overtaken me. It is time for me to leave this world before I mess anything else up.
                                                                                                                                    Sincerely, Husband
Referance page 164: In this section where Shreve is trying to take care of Quentin it just reminded me of an old married couple nagging each other. Also, while Quentin was worried about his clothes (a more feminine reaction) Shreve was getting angered by the nerve of Gerald for beating Quentin up. Could just be a friends reaction... or something else.